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Pope Francis’ message for the 4th world day for grandparents and the elderly 28 July 2024
The World Day for Grandparents and the Elderly will be celebrated for the fourth time in 2024
on Sunday 28 July – the Sunday closest to the Feast of Saints Joachim and Anne,
“Do not cast me off in my old age (Ps 71:9 )
Do not cast me off in the time of old age; forsake me not when my strength is spent.
Dear brothers and sisters,
God never abandons his children, never.
Even when our age advances and our strength diminishes, when our hair turns white and our role in society diminishes, when our lives become less productive and can risk appearing useless.
God does not look at appearances (cf. 1 Sam 16:7 – the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him; for the Lord sees not as man sees; man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.”); he does not disdain to choose those who, to many people, may seem irrelevant. God discards no stone; indeed, the “oldest” are the firm foundation on which “new” stones can rest, in order to join in erecting a spiritual edifice (cf. 1 Peter 2:5 – like living stones be yourselves built into a spiritual house, to be a holy priesthood, to offer spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ).
The whole of Scripture is a story of the Lord’s faithful love.
It offers us the comforting certainty that God constantly shows us his mercy, always, at every stage of life, in whatever situation we find ourselves, even in our betrayals.
The Psalms are full of the wonder of the human heart before God who cares for us in spite of our insignificance (cf. Ps 144:3-4 – O Lord, what is man that thou dost regard him, or the son of man that thou dost think of him? Man is like a breath, his days are like a passing shadow.); they assure us that God has fashioned each one of us from our mother’s womb (cf. Ps 139:13 –For thou didst form my inward parts,
thou didst knit me together in my mother’s womb.) and that even in hell he will not abandon our life (cf. Ps 16:10 – For thou dost not give me up to Sheol, or let thy godly one see the Pit.).
So we can be sure that he will be close to us even in our old age, all the more so because, in the Bible, growing old is a sign of blessing.
At the same time, we find in the Psalms this heartfelt plea to the Lord: “Do not leave me in my old age” (cf. Ps 71:9 – Do not leave me in my old age; do not leave me when my strength is spent).
These are strong, even harsh words. They remind us of the extreme suffering of Jesus, who cried out on the cross: “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” (Mt 27:46).
In the Bible, then, we find both the certainty of God’s closeness at every stage of life and the fear of abandonment, especially in old age and in times of pain.
There is no contradiction here. If we look around us, we have no difficulty seeing that his words reflect a very obvious reality..
Too often, loneliness is the dark companion of our lives as elderly people and grandparents.
When I was Bishop of Buenos Aires, I often visited old people’s homes and noticed how rarely these people received visits. Some had not seen their families for many months.
There are many reasons for this loneliness: in many places, especially in the poorer countries, the elderly are left alone because their children are forced to emigrate.
I also think of the many situations of conflict.
How many elderly people are left alone because men – young people and adults – have been called to fight and women, especially women with small children, have left the country to ensure the safety of their children.
In war-torn towns and villages, many elderly people are left alone, the only signs of life in areas where desolation and death seem to reign.
In other parts of the world, we encounter a false belief, deeply rooted in certain local cultures, that leads to hostility towards the elderly, who are suspected of using witchcraft to sap the vital energies of the young; when premature death or illness or any other misfortune befalls the young, the blame is laid at the door of an elderly person..
This mentality must be fought and eliminated.
It is one of those unfounded prejudices from which the Christian faith has freed us, but which continues to fuel the conflict between the young and the old..
Yet if we think about it, this accusation that the old are “robbing the young of their future” is ubiquitous today. It appears under different guises even in the most advanced and modern societies..
For example, there is now a widespread belief that the elderly are burdening the young with the high cost of the social services that they require, and in this way are diverting resources old are “robbing the young of their future” is ubiquitous today.
It appears under different guises even in the most advanced and modern societies.
This is a distorted view of reality. It assumes that the survival of the elderly threatens that of the young, that to benefit the young, it is necessary to neglect or even oppress the elderly.
Intergenerational conflict is a fallacy and the poisoned fruit of a culture of conflict.
Setting the young against the old is an unacceptable form of manipulation: “What is important is the unity of the different ages of life, which is the real point of reference for understanding and valuing human life in its entirety” (Catechesis, 23 February 2022).
The Psalm quoted above – with its plea not to be abandoned in old age – speaks to a conspiracy surrounding the life of the elderly.
This may seem an exaggeration, but not if we consider that the loneliness and abandonment of the elderly is not accidental or inevitable, but the result of choices – political, economic, social and personal decisions – that fail to recognize the infinite dignity of each person, “beyond any circumstance, condition or situation that the person may ever encounter” (Declaration Dignitas Infinita, 1).
This happens when we lose sight of the value of each individual and people are then judged according to their cost, which in some cases is considered too high to pay. Worse still, the elderly themselves are often the victims of this attitude; they are made to feel that they are a burden and that they should be the first to step aside.
Today, too, many women and men seek personal fulfilment in a life that is as independent as possible and detached from other people.
Group membership is in crisis and individualism is celebrated: the transition from “we” to “I” is one of the most obvious signs of our times.
The family, the first and most radical argument against the idea that we can save ourselves alone, is one of the victims of this individualistic culture.
But when we grow old and our powers begin to decline, the illusion of individualism, that we need no one and can live without social ties, is revealed for what it is. In fact, we find ourselves needing everything, but at a point in life when we are alone, no longer with others to help us, no one to count on. It is a grim discovery that many people make only when it is too late.
Loneliness and abandonment have become recurrent elements in today’s social landscape.
They have many roots. In some cases they are the result of calculated exclusion, a kind of deplorable “social conspiracy”; in others, tragically, they are a matter of personal choice.
In still other cases, the elderly resign themselves to this reality, pretending that it is their free choice.
Increasingly, we have lost “the taste of fraternity” (Fratelli Tutti, 33); we find it difficult even to think of an alternative.
In many elderly people we can observe the sense of resignation described in the Book of Ruth, which tells the story of the elderly Naomi who, after the death of her husband and children, encourages her two daughters-in-law, Orpah and Ruth, to return to their native towns and their homes (cf. Ruth 1:8 – Ruth 1:8 Ruth 1:8 – Na′omi said to her two daughters-in-law, “Go, return each of you to her mother’s house. May the Lord deal kindly with you, as you have dealt with the dead and with me).
Naomi – like many elderly people today – is afraid of remaining alone, yet she cannot imagine anything different. As a widow, she knows that she is of little value in the eyes of society; she sees herself as a burden for those two young woman who, unlike herself, have their whole lives before them.
For this reason, she thinks it best to step aside, and so she tells her young daughters-in-law to leave her and build a future elsewhere (cf. Ruth 1:11-13 But Na′omi said, “Turn back, my daughters, why will you go with me? Have I yet sons in my womb that they may become your husbands? Turn back, my daughters, go your way, for I am too old to have a husband. If I should say I have hope, even if I should have a husband this night and should bear sons, would you therefore wait till they were grown? Would you therefore refrain from marrying? No, my daughters, for it is exceedingly bitter to me for your sake that the hand of the Lord has gone forth against me.”). Her words reflect the rigid social and religious conventions of her day, which apparently seal her own fate.
The biblical narrative then presents us with two different responses to Naomi’s words and to old age itself. One of the two daughters-in-law, Orpah, who loves Naomi, kisses her and, accepting what seemed the only solution possible, goes her way.
However, Ruth does not leave Naomi’s side and, to her surprise, tells her: “Do not press me to leave you” (Ruth 1:16 – Ruth said, “Entreat me not to leave you or to return from following you; for where you go I will go, and where you lodge I will lodge; your people shall be my people, and your God my God;).
Ruth is not afraid to challenge customs and inbred patterns of thought. She senses that the elderly woman needs her and she courageously remains at her side in what will be the start of a new journey for both.
To all of us, who are accustomed to the idea that solitude is our unavoidable lot, Ruth teaches that in response to the plea “Do not abandon me”, it is possible to say, “I will not abandon you”.
Ruth does not hesitate to overturn a seemingly irreversible situation: living alone need not be the only alternative! It is no coincidence that Ruth – who remained at the side of the elderly Naomi – was an ancestor of the Messiah (cf. Mt 1:5 – Salmon the father of Bo′az by Rahab, and Bo′az the father of Obed by Ruth, and Obed the father of Jesse,), of Jesus, Immanuel, “God with us”, the one who brings God’s own closeness and proximity to all people, of all ages and states of life.
Ruth’s freedom and courage invite us to take a new path. Let us follow in her footsteps.
Let us walk with this young stranger and the elderly Naomi, not afraid to change our habits and imagine a different future for our elders.
May we express our gratitude to all those who, often at great sacrifice, follow the example of Ruth in caring for an elderly person or simply in demonstrating daily closeness to relatives or acquaintances who have no one else. Ruth, who chose to stay close to Naomi, was blessed with a happy marriage, a family and a new home.
It is always the same: if we remain close to the elderly, recognizing their unique role in the family, in society and in the Church, we ourselves will receive many gifts, many graces, many blessings!
On this Fourth World Day dedicated to them, let us show our tender love for the grandparents and the elderly members of our families.
Let us spend time with those who are discouraged and no longer hope in the possibility of a different future.
In place of the self-centred attitude that leads to loneliness and abandonment, let us instead show the open heart and the joyful face of men and women who have the courage to say “I will not abandon you”, and to set out on a different path.
To all of you, dear grandparents and elderly persons, and to all those who are close to you I send my blessing, accompanied by my prayers. And I ask you, please, not to forget to pray for me.
Rome, Saint John Lateran, 25 April 2024
